FINE, I HEAR YOU FROM HERE CAPTAIN GEORGE.

Ok, so apparently I can’t be bothered to do race reports. The reports are this, America’s least read blogger got the broom wagon. The rest of the team did great, the mild winter has been a nice setup to the guys/gals coming into the early races and they all look decent if not pretty good.

Except Mitch. He’s turrible.

Look forward to a fundraiser announcement soon, it’ll be awesome as I’ve already been banned from attending and told to hang out with Horst.

Sorry for the radio silence of late. I’ll be back to my part time job of annoying you all starting tomorrow.

Also, Thanks to Russel and Laura for welcoming us into you’re home. I’m not kidding when    I say that said home is absolutely amazing and I’d be amazed if I didn’t earn a permanent 86. Apparently the tabby cat is vegan, and my dripping of bacon in the living room was an issue…. fine…. fine….

Ok, my one reader it’s bedtime for me. Got to get up with the cat/dog vicious combo about 530 ish.

all the cool kids get up at 530 right? Someone back me up on this?….*crickets*

I’ve been horridly misinformed…

Mahallo

Dave

Thats right,  we gathered, and without a parade permit to boot. Of course, such as when Congress meets for the State of the Union, a member of scumcity was quietly whisked off to a top secret location just in case of a catastrophe.

Tentative race schedules were discussed. Beers were consumed. A bunch of bad-ass people from Chicago showed up, and talked. Then, I forgot my helmet at the shop.

Some  Cleveland races with a high probability of a ScumCity showing are

• 331 power series, any and all
• Tour of the Valley, most likely
• Westlake Critz, we were there last year
• Chippewa Creek, who wouldn’t want to wear spandex on their 28th birthday??
• Lakewood Criterium, Heck yes we’re there, bow hunting skills and all
• Other Road Races, probably, who knows, I wasn’t taking notes
• West Virginia Governor’s Cup Regatta, wait… wrong sport
• Some talk of Alley Cats
• NEOCX 2012, of course
• UCI 3 cinci, most  def
• Chicago stuff, I forgot what Will said.. New Years and/or some Golf Course Race that sounded pretty sweet

a meeting of the minds might be an overstatement....

Actually, there are no ways to make indoor training of any kind less bleeding boring. So I advise getting outside and getting into some trouble. This winter has been really really easy on everyone and I have no problems with that. Not at all, as I work outside.

Ok, on to an important topic and one all my two readers log on to read. Yes, you guessed it wierdo in France, Food. The best part of being into bikes is that food no longer is something you obsess over. Why yes I will have a plate of that delicious pasta, Oh, it comes with soup? Fantastic, let’s do that. I’ve been very fortunate in that I can get away with dietary murder because of my job. That brings me to where you should be going for said sustenance The Lion on Lorain. I’ve been there a few times and never have had a bad experience. The food is always really good and the staff is great. I’ve never walked out hungry and for me that’s nigh on impossible. As I can eat my own head in emergencies if I have to. You guys should see me at work when I’ve worked through  lunch and I’m really busy I half look sleeping the other half livid. It’s actually pretty funny.

Back on track, I highly recomend the Lion for a night out. Staff is awesome, the owner is a good guy and the chef is sending out really really good food at excellent prices. Captain George, Mitch and Alexis and myself went there tuesday and had an excellent dinner of tacos. Actually the Vegan Soba Noodle and tofu taco looked awesome. No I did not get one, and that’s my loss. So, if you’re planning a Saturday training ride, how about having it end at the lion? I think you’d rather like the place and should check it out.

Oh well, it’s about time for me to finish getting ready to go to work, have a fun day and don’t do anything too stupid. Captain George I’m looking at you….

Dave.

To quote My Drunk Kitchen “Hello!”

Happy Superbowl Sunday everyone! I know my two readers are super pumped to watch Dallas play Trinidad and Tobago. I keed, I keed actually I think this’ll be the first time in years I don’t bother to watch the game. Not because I hate football or anything I actually love the game. Mostly due to the fact that I barely watched a game all season, I’d generally catch the wrap ups at Roccos on Mondays while Bageling(thats a verb, right?). So I think I’ll be relaxing with a diggety dog, possibly taking her for a walk during that time. Who knows really it’s a brand new crazy non superbowl world for me.

Speaking of the dog, I went running with my dog tuesday I’ll have all of you know my dog’s fitness level currently blows mine out of the water. By a lot, I’ve got some serious work to do if I ever want to be able to tire out a Greta. But that’s not the worst goal to have in life isn’t it? I gotta start talking about bikes soon, right?

Ok, now onto the elephant in the room. The 2 year investigation into Lance is over and no charges will be filed. Honestly I’m tired of hearing about drugs in cycling, all of us know they’ve been around forever, and they’re not going away any time soon. I’m no fool, they’re part of the sport. It’s a part I’d love to see go away myself but that will happen more naturally I think rather then WADA rooting them out. I think a lot of the young cats coming up feel the same way I do, just fucking tired of answering the question. Don’t do the drugs, then you don’t have to hide it or worry. Then you can just ride a bike, novel idea for the PRO folks. Riding a fucking bike, get back to that please so I can enjoy the sport I love without the hanging cloud of questions. I’m just tired of every person asking me about drugs in cycling “oh no, I don’t watch cycling at all but they’re all on drugs, right?”. Yeah, I’m getting real tired of this one guys help a brother out.

It’s not like I’m bugging you about how much weed the NBA smokes, mmkay.

I’m hearing good things about the training that the other guys are doing, I’ve yet to do much myself, but they’ve been keeping themselves busy which is good. I hope to make a good showing next year, keep the momentum up that we gained this fall. Hopefully the team additions help as well.

Hey, also Yehuda moon is back, and it’s the best 12 bucks a year you’ll spend. Having been a reader for years, I say toss the cash down. Also it’s our friendly local web comic the guys who put it out are good folks who do good work. But that’s me, it’s your 12 bucks buy whatever you want.

The sun’s starting to come up earlier and earlier. Not many people notice like I do, but it is. That’s a great sign the winter is on its way out. Not that it really hit us that hard this year, it’s been a breeze actually. Easiest one I can remember in forever. I even got to wear my jersey at work, with no jacket. Kinda cool, ya know?

Well, I’m gonna start my sunday by that I mean screw off on the internet and drink coffee. All my one reader have a fun Sunday and keep it rubber side down.

Dave.

Lets just say that right now I’d sell any of our three readers for some coffee or a can of monster.

That being said, I’d like to send a quick shout out to all the downtown places that tip in coffee. The only two things better to get as a tip is beer or cash, but coffee generally is king. It keeps me awake, stops the murderous thoughts from creeping in.

Speaking of murderous thoughts, I got hipped to this Horseshit. I mean really, having a polo bike is quasi OK. Playing polo is fine. Shit like this makes us all look bad. I’m waiting on the Vera Wang Track Bike myself, possibly the Kanye West BMX racer. Then cycling has jumped the shark, And i’m off to perfect my unicycle technique. That is until Prada makes one.

If anyone is reading this from The Cleveland International Film Festival I have a late inning submission for you Peloton the Movie. The level of Craptastic it looks like this movie achieves appears off the charts. This movie might possibly be worse then BMX Bandits. That would be an accomplishment because that move was straight up crap. Thanks All hail the Black Market for that nugget of wonderful.

Well, there goes my alarm next to me I guess its time to get up and go to work. I don’t like 530 in the morning but such is life when you’re big pimpin like I am. I GOT CATS TO FEED, SON! And a dog, not that I forgot about her, it’s the Internet you have to default to cat references.

Our raffle copy of Double Dragon arrived! You may ask, where did you have to go to get this piece of early 90s Americana? The answer is Korea for those of you playing along at home. So I’ll drop that and the raffle tickets off tomorrow at Joy Machines so one of our lucky supporters can have one of the greatest movies ever shot in Cleveland, starring our own “Hollywood” Karpinski. It’s an epic coming of age tale, a story for the ages truly.

Is it bad that I wake up thinking about bagels? I dunno, they’re the first thing that pops into my rather empty dome, like a siren’s song beckoning me to Roccos “ride in, nobody’s gonna try to kill you, then you’ll have a sweet bit of awesome” I guess it’s the little things. Being a messenger is like Chat Roulette, occasionally something awesome happens, most of the time it’s just some dude fapping into a webcam. Oh well, that’s a thought to be banished to the back half of the brain. No reason to think about that pre coffee.

It’s about time for me to break out my big boy pants and get ready to go to work. Don’t do anything stupid today and keep it rubber side down.

Rad Racing for Life

Dave

We got our first Spam comment today! I was so happy I kinda did the dance of joy while letting the dog out. And if you wanted to know, I was the one who let the dog out. Feel free to pass that along to the Baha men.

I was happy to see the guys at Volagi fought their lawsuit as they did. That might be the most expensive dollar I’ve ever heard of, but I for one am happy that they stood in open court and fought. I’ll probably never be able to afford one of their bikes, but I’d like to think the option to purchase one is more important then my ability to afford it. Because any more I’m sweating Chipotle, not considering upgrading to Crabon Fibre.

I need all our readers to help me with something(my dad and one other guy in San Francisco trying to be super ironic) I want to bring Bike Snob to Cleveland to do a BRA. That’s book related appearance if you don’t read his blog. And if you don’t for fucks sakes stop reading mine and immediately go here. I promise you he’s actually funny, whereas I just make Baha Men references. But I think if we all bug Chronicle Books enough it might just actually happen. I’d think it’d be rather fun to see that traveling circus come through town.

All seems good here at Camp Scum City, I actually got to hang out with Captain George sunday. Let me just say this. He’s always made bold clothing choices but his matching corduroy tuxedo is totally amazing. Also, much like Joe Parkin captain george has awesome hair. He’s a dream boat! Everyone on the team is staying busy, staying out of trouble, training when well, let’s just say a lot more then me. But with winter finally showing up and staying around I think group rides are gonna be far between for a bit till it breaks. Until then we’re just gonna keep using our flirty girl fitness poles and our shake weights. It’s excercise I promise!

Well, my alarm just went off which means I have to get up and start getting ready to go to work. I do not like 5 am, I do not like it Sam I am. But, as I used to say in a former life, it is what it is. Although I think I should have made coffee. That might have ruled, hard.

Oh well, time to start getting my shit together for the day. Have a nice day everyone hopefully you get some bacon. Or Fakin, or whatever.

Is it Friday yet?

Dave

…bitches.

Introducing two more riders! Both currently live in Chicago, but Erin got a sweet job and is moving this week to Omaha…

First: Erin Young. Hailing from the twin cities, this guy pretty much just rules. Likes racing cross (otherwise he wouldn’t be on the team) and track. So much that he has gotten a podium finish for Minnesota States Match Sprint. Welcome. Also he really likes pink so send him pink man-thongs.

Next: Nikki Munvez, all around mountain biking, track bike – Litespeed riding badass. She raced one cross race last year, but owns in alleycats, mountain biking, and road riding. She will be one of us to own the Rustbelt team cross frame. Nikki loves vegetables more than anyone i’ve ever met, send her a bag of dirt or something.

sweetdudes&sweetladies.

Man, this interface still has its “new webpage smell”. Now, if you guys were actually near me you’d see I’ve been blatantly punching the keyboard for the last two hours trying to configure email settings for the new site. Looks a lot like this actually

But, hopefully I’m still a geek and can figure this out, we want to be official and all, ya know? It’s been a fun couple weeks getting this site up and running, I learned a lot. I learned I can’t build a website to save my soul whatever soul I have left.

On to some news of Awesome, We’re having a bit of a contest here at Scum City and up for grabs is a copy of Double Dragon, signed by our own “Hollywood” J Karpinski. What most people don’t know is that that was his first of many blockbuster films he appeared in. He has, being the nice guy that he is, agreed to sign a copy of the movie to one of our supporters, Tickets will go on sale at Joy Machines starting January 21. Drawing to occur later, and possibly movie given out at a night out with the team. All proceeds go to Charity, and by charity I mean the team. Because we’re broke, bigtime. Hell we should qualify as a charity at this point! I mean, look at this piece of mastery!

Well, it’s about time for me to get off the idiot box for a bit and make some coffee, because it’s sunday and that’s gotta happen. Hopefully everyone can get outside today, It’s really nice out!

Mahallo

Dave

Well, we’re now on our own web space everybody! Make sure to check here instead of the other place. That awful awful place, blogger. Thanks to Taylor and Kendall for walking me through a ton of stuff in getting this done. Maybe I’ll let Kendall be the mayor of rocco’s again. Maybe.

Keep checking here I’ll be updating frequently, as will all the other guys.

Mahallo

Dave

It’s that time of the year again, where everyone makes new years resolutions and hopefully keeps them. Here at 635 in the morning on a saturday your tireless blogger sits and is at a loss for what to resolve to do. Not that I accomplished much this year but that goes without saying. On the team front I’d really like us to to make a showing during the road racing season. Not to say we won’t or we can’t or any of that nonsense but I’d like to see that work out in our favor. I fully intend to at least try my hand at road racing. Can’t be that hard really it’s riding a bike.
On a personal level this year I’m gonna ride my goddamn bike. Last year was a miserable shit show for me and that’s gotta change. Even if it means 9 pm bedtimes on saturday nights to squeeze in a 6 am ride I gotta do it. I think I’m gonna focus on just clocking in as many miles as I can squeeze in once the weather breaks in june or july.
I hope everyone has a nice new years eve and day and stays safe, it’s amateur night out there so be careful on the roads. If you need me I’ll be the one hopefully sleeping in past 6 tomorrow.

Mahallo
Dave