I know it’s race day everyone so you’re getting ready but I figured I’d check in and let ya’ll know I’m not dead. OK, I’m not dead so lets get down to business.
1. We still need a team drink, copy of Double Dragon still up for grabs.
2. Riser bars are the shit.
3. Captain George needs to stop phoning at 3 am drunk on Four Loko. I mean come on, get shitfaced on Yuengling or PBR or Steel Reserve or Genny White cans like the rest of us.
As I enter into another season of CX I have questions. Where’s the registration? Why hasn’t Burkey brought me that beer I asked him for on the twitters a year ago? Why is Mitch so damned attractive? And as you can understand, my one reader is that this is why I am slow and crappy at cross. I’ve got too many questions running about my huge dome to race.
Keep telling yourself that fatty.
Actually this season feels OK. I’m failing miserably but at least I’m not dying out there like last year. I’m ok with failure provided I gave it my all and had something in these ancient legs to give. I’m happy with this season already, Elyria was a good time and lets hope Canadian John remembers his wallet, cause frankly sir you may have an amazing moustache but I can’t afford to keep covering you. That may be the way they do it in the great white north but here in ‘merica an awesome moustache can only get you so far. You generally become a motorcycle cop, fyi. I’m looking forward to seeing Captain George actually race as he “pulled a George” last week. Oh, my one reader this is defined as: Eating shit and going over the handlebars. He used to do it all the time as a messenger and the term just stuck.
On the CX front I really want to try to get food trucks to our races but it seems like between locations, local laws, and the such it’s just no bueno. Which for the record sucks, CX racing will grow wildly locally if we had food trucks following us around. And anyone who knows me knows that watching cross grow is kinda my thing. Ugg, maybe next year? Maybe next year? Jesus, what am I a Browns fan?
Actually I am a huge football fan but you guys knew that.
I ordered and read a copy of Molly Hurford’s book “Mud Snow and Cyclocross” and for the record really liked it. Molly has a nice laid back voice and really does a nice job of covering what is actually a mammoth subject.
ALL OF CX IN AMERICA EVER EVER EVAR
It’s a really nice informative read that never seems to get bogged down with just pages of facts or stats. I really liked that, it was a book about a sport that read like someone telling stories not a collection of stats on stats while stats watch and stats videotape then put it on the internet. Hence avoiding the most boring of sports book issues, me not giving a shit through entire sections of numbers. I see my own CX stats and that’s depressing enough thankyouverymuch. She got great interviews, and laid down a really nice very approachable overview of cross, she actually managed to talk about fun in a cycling book. Shhhh don’t tell anyone, they’ll make her add crank reviews and interval workouts to her next book. That was one of many reasons I liked it, She talked about fun. Fun, on bikes, with your friends. Something painfully lacking in the cycling writing of our times. It’s all about tech and suffering to some and thankfully Molly fit in more fun than tech and suffering and for that, I owe her a beer. Plz don’t ask me for a good beer though. I’m a bike messenger, that money can be spent on other important things like parts.
Back to the lecture at hand, If you’re a cross racer, or know one or even am just thinking about it this book is a great piece of material to read. It does a great job of showing a love of cross, explains a whole lot about the sport and does it in a nifty short package that I know you’ll like so grab a copy rite meow wherever you can and you won’t be disappointed one bit.
Yes you in the back?
OH FUCK OFF I CAN READ, I’M NOT ILLITERATE JUST A SHITTY WRITER.
Or if you have zero attention span may I advise Cx the comic. Ok it’s about time for me to make coffee and ready myself to take dead last and get drunk in the process.